I hate facebook.

recently reactivated after about 6 months. creeped on people.

stumbled upon this girl i can only remember seeing in my dreams. 

I move into my apartment tomorrow.

I’m going to miss my friends from home. I’m only an hour and a half away but it’s still tough.

I’m also worried about work, I hurt myself 3 weeks ago and was supposed to start the day after my accident. They said they would keep me, but they haven’t responded in a week.  I already paid for the summer (first, last, security) so I’m down that in addition to being out of 120+ hours work.

I’m supposed to leave for Spain on June 30, but I haven’t been able to file for financial aid yet. 

I want to go, but I need to make up my missed time. My friend’s been having trouble finding work out there. 

But I’ll make the best of it either way. I’m glad to be out of Boston.

One of my pet peeves with this site is all of the, in my opinion, bad advice that gets circulated.

This mainly stems from the post saying to not let go of someone you can’t go a day without thinking about. This is wrong for so many reasons. In my case- because had I attempted to rekindle the fire she put out I would have been left even sadder than I was ignoring her. Had I succeeded, I would have been getting back into a relationship that drove me to alcohol to cope.

This ended in January and I still miss her. She was a combination of intelligent and fucked up mixed with funny and beautiful that I had never experienced. Looking back I can only remember being happy. Her influence helped me to begin writing again, more than I had in years.

I like to believe that her justification for ending the relationship I was almost forced into (that there was no point to it) was made because she didn’t want to be hurt by our inevitable separation upon her graduation but also because she remembered something I told her one night as we walked back to my room. Something I forgot I said until recently.

I told her, “I take pictures when I’m happy, and I write when I’m sad.”

And she only saw me use my camera the night we first became more than friends.